All posts filed under: Figuring It All Out

Losing My Virginity at 21

Until it happened, I thought it never would. But then, one night, it just did. I was 15 the first time I heard the word “virgin” used as an insult. And until only three weeks ago, the word plagued my own self-perception. Until only three weeks ago, the socially constructed concept of virginity was an inherent and undesirable part of who I was. (Hell, even my astronomical sign is a Virgo). I’m only 21, I know. I have an entire life ahead of me. But in our day and age, sex is part of our social vocabulary from the time we enter high school – or worse, sometimes earlier. I was 16 the first time I considered having sex, and while I see now that waiting so long was worth it, the embarrassment that came with my inexperience never failed to exacerbate the pain I felt with each failed connection or disappointing encounter; at seemingly every possible occasion, I called into question whether I would ever find the right person to “lose it” to – …